When the story ends

I am decaying away.
Trapped in a castle of anxiety, social expectations, and words. I try to run away, but it is difficult when there are no spoken ties to happiness and blood ties to responsibility.

Now, I feel like I'm 18 again. Bumming around.
I want to smell the freedom of failure and a smile on my cheek. I want to hear broken and tainted words because we are all broken and tainted.

I want to find a job and live on my own and complete what is deemed necessary for happiness.
Where are you truly happy?

I feel like I'm crumbling.